Learning to say “no” is the essence of being “assertive” and having “good boundaries,” according to many self-help gurus. It’s also something that many mothers of three-year-olds wish never happened. But that’s a whole other Oprah, as they say. I certainly do not disagree with the first point and will not belabor this concept any more than it already has been. As they say, “No is a complete sentence.”
I want to make a case, however, for learning to say “Yes!”
I don’t mean the codependent, people-pleasing “yes,” followed by resentment and, if we’re lucky, lessons on saying “no.” I also don’t mean the “positive mental attitude” “yes” portrayed in the movie, “Yes Man.” I mean saying “yes” to those things in life that we really want. Many of us don’t know what we want, need, or desire. We might think we do, or others will gladly tell us, or we’re too busy saying “no” to think about it.
What do you or would you like to say “yes” to?
How easy or hard is this question for you? For those who say, “Easy,” I say, “Tell me your secret!” For the rest of us, this may be one of the most important questions of our lives.
What would life be like if you said “yes” to your self and those things that are “you?”
Copyright 2013 Daniel J. Metevier